chips

If you know me well, you know they are my weakness. And lately I've been gorging on them. I'm really surprised I haven't broke out in a huge zit yet. (Well, now that I've put that in writing, I'm sure to wake up with one. haha!) I feel like a big peice of salty grease, but just can't stop. I've been wondering what the hell my problem is, other than just them being my weakness, and it just dawned on me that next week is Kassidy's appointment and that's why I'm horking out. Not that I forgot about her appointment. Good greif no. Every time I look at her walk I'm analyzing it, wondering if everything is where it's supposed to be. Even though I know the appointment is coming I've been pushing the thoughts about it, I mean the possible outcomes, to the back of my mind. Forcing myself not to think about it. Which leads me to my chips.

I want to think positive, but if you look in past posts you can see that it only lead to big disappointments. It's so much easier to be disappointed if you are at level 5 and crash to zero than being at level 9 and crashing to zero. (Did that make sense?) I'm not looking for sympathy, I'm just writing this because it feels good to share my feelings, and even if no one else has been through this it's still nice to know that someone reads this cares. :)

This weekend we are camping. I'm sooooo excited! Dan has said over and over again that this summer he wants to make every weekend about our family and camping. This will be our first weekend out. First of many. :) I think Kassidy is catching a cold, but I fed her lots of chicken soup and garlic tonight (sorry if she stinks, Crystal. haha).

Well, only four days away. I'm sure as we get closer to the day I'll become more and more anxious, moody and emotional, so any prayers you can shoot our way would be very much appreciated. In the mean time I'll try to tone down my eating binges so that I don't have to start buying new pairs of pants. haha.